to find words

painting by david friedman

hello from israel...

a moment to write has passed my way... a desire to share of the amazement in my life is strong... and yet i am intimidated by this blank screen. where to begin? what to share?questions anyone?!

my experience here has moved me in so many ways. the land, the people, judaism, the reality of life here, community, relationships, growth, learning, observing, listening, experiencing, feeling, wondering ...LIVING.

i'll save a day to day account until i can properly link you up to some information about the places i've visited...

since the "official" trip has ended the most prominent feeling sitting within me has been a sense of being filled with so much love. blessings are not to be taken for granted in this place. my appreciation and gratitude grows ever-stronger.

sleep is knocking at the door. i guess this is just a quick pop-in to say hello... stay tuned more to follow as the process unfolds!
posted by ashley


there's a discussion going on at the integral naked website, and below is a piece of what i wrote. i feel like sharing it over here too. it is intriguing to me to feel all of the concern and worry that people express about my travels to israel. i am so grateful for and comforted by all of the prayers and protection that loved ones are sharing with me, showering me with. i've felt so honored and special seeing the genuine concern and love in one's eyes when they've said goodbye and wished me safe travels. it's been different than any other "going away" experience that i have had in the past.

i'd like to share where i am right now, as these slightly stress-full moments of figuring out what to put into my suitcase pass through me. fear is not my present emotion. i am so excited and curious about the adventures that lie before me. there is such a deep unknown beckoning me... and i am thrilled to have the opportunity to dive in. i am not saying that there is NO uncertainty or nervousness present. any new experience that i embark upon seems to entice me with those nervous jitters. the tingling sensations stimulated by thoughts of this trip, however, are connected with the spiritual journey upon which i am embarking. the land is calling me, to be afraid is not. and so...with these thoughts, i found the words i posted about death to be interesting. while i was referring to more symbolic deaths than loss of human life, it all seems very relevant to my world right now!

...it is only when things die naturally that they push the creative edge to a new point. growth, change, awareness, creation...

and absolutely all "things" must die (thoughts, emotions, identities, things we love...but here i ponder... love? ...it seems not to die. i share this thought non-experientially. i've never felt a death of love. i think that one's life is one's definition of love, so therefore in life, love cannot die...and obviously, that's just one look at that FULL word--l o v e ). while there is much to be felt in death...it is equally a part of the cycle...and i love it. slyly present in my grief are the subtle threads of new life...in whatever design of manifestation.
posted by ashley



oh-my, i've found a gem! join with me in learning about YES! Youth for Environmental Sanity ... quite an inspiring group. here's a bit of what they have to say...

"Youth stand at a threshold point in life, as they make choices that will send out vast ripples. Some young people believe growing up means abandoning their ideals. To us, it means learning how to live our ideals, every day, on the Earth. We believe that if the passion, creativity and commitment of youth can be liberated for the common good, we can transform our world. "

and here are some words from Ocean Robbins, founder (at age 16...13 years ago) and co-president

“Sometimes older folks tell me: ‘I was idealistic and thought I could change the world once, too, but then I grew up.’ I’m trying to help us change our definition of growing up, so that it ceases to mean giving up on our ideals, and comes to mean learning how to live our dreams, every day, on the Earth. I want to awaken the passion and creativity of youth, combine it with the wisdom, experience and insight of elders, and transform our world."

What you appreciate - appreciates."
- LynneTwist

posted by ashley



the birds are chirping outside my window as the sun inches its way into my life! i just sent an email descriptive of today to my dear friend and mentor, chris weaver. thanks chris, for the inspiration you share in so many ways.

here's to this day!!

academic responsibilities are trickling down my back, their weight becoming oh-so light! immune defenses are working oh-so hard, putting me to sleep at 8:30 last night. anticipation jitters are starting to sparkle on the horizon. procrastination of cleaning and organizing this life here prior to departure, very real! great-full-ness, alive and thriving...

here's a taste of what my trip to israel might entail.
posted by ashley

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